Dear Nicole Arbour

By now most people have been suggested to this white trash bimbo that thinks she knows everything there is to know in the world. Most of the time when someone presents a rant, you can at least kinda sorta get behind the argument and they may make one or two good points. Shit for brains here couldn’t. Basically her argument is “ew, you’re fat and gross and don’t deserve special treatment so like, don’t eat or whatever.”

Wow, what an absolutely ignorant point of view. I guess we should go around to people that have thoughts of suicide, punch them in the shoulder, and tell them to stop being depressing because they’re being a real downer. I mean, what kind of fucking logic is this? I watched the whole video thinking that maybe she was just being sarcastic or canon, but no, I never got that impression.

So a little about me and a shit ton of my coworkers (no offense meant, but someone will probably be offended, so hey). We work in a call center. Call centers, also known as cubicle dungeons, are beneficial to absolutely no one’s health. And yet, I do have skinny coworkers. Why? Well, sometimes they get lucky and it’s genetics or maybe they’re vegan or something like that, but mostly it’s that they work out like a motherfucker when they’re not on the clock.

Why? Because you do 2 things when you work in a call center: sit and take calls (aka verbal abuse). Scratch that, 3 things: drink caffeine. Caffeine is a stimulant and initially it can boost your metabolism. However, too much caffeine coupled with all the sugar can make you fat, out of shape in general, and lower your overall quality of life (and I say this as I sip some caffeine).


Glorious, terrible caffeine

Oh okay, so we should all just work out like motherfuckers and problem solved! Well, no. See, some of us (okay almost all of us, you got me) are borderline or completely clinically depressed. Part of it is the poor diet, part of it is sitting all day, part of it is the verbal abuse, and that’s just work. Some people, like myself, may also be dealing with the stress of debt, children, upcoming events, and any one of a number of things life can throw at you.

And no, I’m not saying your life is perfect and you don’t suffer from any of these, but you act like the most braindead Barbie girl I can possibly fathom to the point of being a self-parody. You even admit there are legit problems people may have that cause them to slip into obesity and have trouble getting out of it, but then immediately ignore that valid argument and continue to fat shame, which is a thing you fucking moron.

First of all, eating less doesn’t work the way you think. Dieting also doesn’t always work. Some people are hypoglycemic, have weird metabolisms or allergies, are diabetic, or any one of a number of fun things. There are days where I can eat one or two meals and be fine, and others where I could eat six times and still feel like I’m going to pass out any second.

Now sure, I try to eat healthy every time I eat, but that’s not always a viable option when, oh hey, you’re working in a call center! Telling a fat person “ugh, like just, don’t eat or whatever” is about the most useless advice you can give. In most cases, the body will STORE FAT when you refuse to eat or don’t eat enough. Yes, there are people that overeat, but that might also be caused by physical or psychological issues.


But hey, just don’t eat or whatever

Also, this stupid argument of “omg they’re killing themselves and we’re helping them!” What? Really? Last time I checked, it’s a free country. If I want to go to a buffet and stuff my face, I can do that. If I want to spray paint my hair and spout stupid commentary on youtube completely offending a shit ton of people like a goddamn moron, I can do that too. Isn’t freedom awesome?

So what are you saying, exactly? Oh no, fat people parking at the front because they got a disability tag THAT A DOCTOR ADMINISTERED IN GOOD CONSCIENCE. Are you really that fucking stupid? Yes, some people simply never learned the value of restraint and have a tendency to do things outside of common sense, such as eat too much, light fireworks out of their asshole, skydive naked, or make videos on youtube that are deliberately offensive and bullying in nature.

This would be like saying “why don’t we just ship blind people in coach inside a shipping container because they’re not going to know the difference” or “deaf people are great because I can make fun of them all day and they’ll never know.” The problem isn’t how a person became obese or why they’re staying there; the problem is people like you that will never learn that often it’s your words that caused them to get there in the first place.

Some people binge eat over stress, even if it’s stress from trying to lose weight. Sounds counter-productive, but stay with me here. I have a lot of problems with money. Often I get paid and it’s pretty much all fucking gone in 2 days. So what, do I pool together what I have and try to save every last penny? Sure, for a while…then I become depressed because I feel like it’s just never going to get any better, so I buy alcohol.


Alcohol. Because fuck it.

Not a lot of alcohol, mind you, but alcohol all the same. Yeah, it’s a contradiction. I know the money situation is bad, but then I spend money on shit I don’t need. But I do so not even because I necessarily want a beer, but because I don’t even want to fucking think about it anymore. And sadly, my impulsive behavior parrots a lot of peoples’ plights these days.

Okay, so I drink…and fat people eat. And sometimes, it’s not even that simple. I know plenty of people that work out constantly and legitimately try to stick with a diet that causes them to be in constant agony, but they just don’t seem to lose weight, so they get discouraged and fall off the bandwagon. Oh but hey, at least you’ll be RIGHT THERE shaming them the INSTANT they do, right?

Yeah, because that’s helpful. I personally believe there isn’t ONE person who watched your video and took that as inspiring commentary to help them try to move past their problems. Funnier still, that’s how you act throughout the video, like you’re upholding some sort of twisted moral crusade. News flash: there will always be ugly in the world, and sometimes it looks like a dopey blonde girl with a shitty fuchsia streak in her hair.

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